Yak Shaving Guild: Difference between revisions
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''"I was going to fix the wiki, but first I had to update the server. But first I needed to learn Docker. But first I had to upgrade my laptop. But first I had to find my charger. But first I had to clean my desk. But first..."''{{guilds}} | ''"I was going to fix the wiki, but first I had to update the server. But first I needed to learn Docker. But first I had to upgrade my laptop. But first I had to find my charger. But first I had to clean my desk. But first..."''{{guilds}} | ||
== About == | == 🐃 About == | ||
'''What we do:''' Document, honor, and occasionally complete the endless chains of prerequisite tasks that stand between a hacker and their original goal. | '''What we do:''' Document, honor, and occasionally complete the endless chains of prerequisite tasks that stand between a hacker and their original goal. | ||
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'''How levels work:''' In this guild, levels represent self-awareness and documentation practice, not speed or efficiency. Finishing quickly is not the point. | '''How levels work:''' In this guild, levels represent self-awareness and documentation practice, not speed or efficiency. Finishing quickly is not the point. | ||
🟢 '''Aware''' = "I can recognize when I'm yak shaving" | |||
🟡 '''Documenting''' = "I diagram my yak shaves as they unfold" | |||
🟣 '''Transcendent''' = "I have achieved peace with the infinite regress" | |||
''Maximum verified depth is tracked separately. See Hall of Fame.'' | ''Maximum verified depth is tracked separately. See Hall of Fame below.'' | ||
{| class="wikitable" | {| class="wikitable" | ||
!Member | !Member | ||
| Line 49: | Line 49: | ||
|- | |- | ||
|0xDEADBEEF | |0xDEADBEEF | ||
| | |🟣 | ||
|11 | |11 | ||
|Infrastructure yaks | |Infrastructure yaks | ||
|- | |- | ||
|Mirepoix | |Mirepoix | ||
| | |🟡 | ||
|7 | |7 | ||
|Toolchain yaks | |Toolchain yaks | ||
|- | |- | ||
|Barnacle | |Barnacle | ||
| | |🟡 | ||
|6 | |6 | ||
|Hardware yaks | |Hardware yaks | ||
|- | |- | ||
|sudo_feel_better | |sudo_feel_better | ||
| | |🟢 | ||
|4 | |4 | ||
|Documentation yaks (ironic) | |Documentation yaks (ironic) | ||
|- | |- | ||
|Pliers | |Pliers | ||
| | |🟢 | ||
|3 | |3 | ||
|Still identifying specialty | |Still identifying specialty | ||
| Line 75: | Line 75: | ||
== Guild Norms == | == Guild Norms == | ||
''' | '''Developed through painful experience:''' | ||
* If your yak shave exceeds '''5 levels deep''', you must diagram it for the archive | * If your yak shave exceeds '''5 levels deep''', you must diagram it for the archive | ||
* Depth claims require a witness or documentation. We've had... exaggerations. | * Depth claims require a witness or documentation. We've had... exaggerations. | ||
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== Hall of Fame: Legendary Shaves == | == Hall of Fame: Legendary Shaves == | ||
Verified chains of 5+ levels, documented for posterity. | Verified chains of 5+ levels, documented for glorious posterity. | ||
=== 🏆 The Eleven-Layer Infrastructure Yak (2024) === | === 🏆 The Eleven-Layer Infrastructure Yak (2024) === | ||
Latest revision as of 00:56, 14 December 2025
"I was going to fix the wiki, but first I had to update the server. But first I needed to learn Docker. But first I had to upgrade my laptop. But first I had to find my charger. But first I had to clean my desk. But first..."
| Noisebridge | About | Visit | 272 | Manual | Contact | Guilds | Stuff | Events | Projects | Meetings | Donate | E |
| Guilds (Volunteer) | Maintainers | Meta | Code | Electronics | Fabrication | Games | Sewing | Music | AI | Neuro | Philosophy | Funding | Art | Security | Ham | WGs | E |
🐃 About
[edit | edit source]What we do: Document, honor, and occasionally complete the endless chains of prerequisite tasks that stand between a hacker and their original goal.
What is yak shaving? Any seemingly pointless activity which is actually necessary to solve a problem which solves a problem which, several alarm levels away, solves the real problem you're working on.
Where: Everywhere. Yak shaving knows no physical bounds. This is a fully distributed guild. Members have reported shaving yaks from four continents, two airports, and one moving train.
Online: Find us in the Noisebridge Discord in the Guilds section as #🤘-yak-shaving
Equipment we steward: None. The yak is metaphorical. (Do not bring actual yaks to Noisebridge.)
Regular meetups: We keep meaning to schedule one, but first we need to fix the calendar integration...
Stewards
[edit | edit source]Stewards maintain the archive of legendary shaves and certify depth claims. This role rotates annually, assuming the handoff process ever gets finished.
| Name | Role | Since | Contact |
|---|---|---|---|
| 0xDEADBEEF | Steward | March 2023 | @deadbeef on Discord |
| Harriet | Steward Emeritus | 2019–2022 | Unreachable (still finishing original yak) |
Directory: Depths Achieved
[edit | edit source]How levels work: In this guild, levels represent self-awareness and documentation practice, not speed or efficiency. Finishing quickly is not the point.
🟢 Aware = "I can recognize when I'm yak shaving"
🟡 Documenting = "I diagram my yak shaves as they unfold"
🟣 Transcendent = "I have achieved peace with the infinite regress"
Maximum verified depth is tracked separately. See Hall of Fame below.
| Member | Level | Max Verified Depth | Specialty |
|---|---|---|---|
| 0xDEADBEEF | 🟣 | 11 | Infrastructure yaks |
| Mirepoix | 🟡 | 7 | Toolchain yaks |
| Barnacle | 🟡 | 6 | Hardware yaks |
| sudo_feel_better | 🟢 | 4 | Documentation yaks (ironic) |
| Pliers | 🟢 | 3 | Still identifying specialty |
Guild Norms
[edit | edit source]Developed through painful experience:
- If your yak shave exceeds 5 levels deep, you must diagram it for the archive
- Depth claims require a witness or documentation. We've had... exaggerations.
- It is considered poor form to yak-shame. We've all been there.
- You may not count "making coffee" as level 1. That's just being alive.
- Recursive yak shaves (shaving a yak in order to document a yak shave) are scored separately
⚠️ Health advisory: If you have been shaving the same yak for more than 6 months, please reach out to a steward. We have resources.
Hall of Fame: Legendary Shaves
[edit | edit source]Verified chains of 5+ levels, documented for glorious posterity.
🏆 The Eleven-Layer Infrastructure Yak (2024)
[edit | edit source]Original goal: Update the wiki header
Documented by: 0xDEADBEEF
Goal: Update wiki header
└─ Need wiki admin access
└─ Need to contact previous admin
└─ Previous admin's email bounces
└─ Need to find them on social media
└─ LinkedIn requires account
└─ Need professional headshot
└─ Camera battery dead
└─ Charger cable frayed
└─ Need soldering iron
└─ Soldering iron tip corroded
└─ Need to order tips
└─ Amazon account locked
└─ [ABANDONED]
Header was eventually updated 8 months later by someone else.
The Backwards Time Machine Yak (2023)
[edit | edit source]Original goal: Recover file from backup
Documented by: Mirepoix
Goal: Recover file from backup
└─ Backup is on old hard drive
└─ Old hard drive uses FireWire
└─ FireWire adapter doesn't work on M1 Mac
└─ Need to boot old MacBook
└─ Old MacBook needs Yosemite
└─ Yosemite installer requires Apple ID
└─ Apple ID email is defunct Hotmail
└─ Hotmail account recovery requires phone number from 2009
└─ That phone number belongs to someone in Ohio now
└─ [CALLED STRANGER IN OHIO, SURPRISINGLY HELPFUL]
File was recovered. Purpose of file recovery, however, could not be recalled.
Recent Submissions
[edit | edit source]- Dec 2025: "The SSH Key Cascade" 6 (Barnacle) — original goal was to check server uptime
- Nov 2025: "The Font Incident" 5 (sudo_feel_better) — original goal was to send an email
- Oct 2025: "Nested Documentation" 5 (sudo_feel_better) — original goal was to document a yak shave
Knowledge Base
[edit | edit source]Resources for the practicing yak shaver:
- How to Recognize You're Yak Shaving — Warning signs and interventions
- Diagramming Standards — Official notation for yak shave trees
- The Ethics of Abandonment — When to walk away (and why it's okay)
- Yak Shave vs. Scope Creep — A taxonomy
- Famous Historical Yak Shaves — Including "how fixing a printer led to the creation of GNU"
How to Join
[edit | edit source]If you're reading this, you're probably already a member.
Formally joining is simple:
- Document your first yak shave of 3+ levels
- Submit it to a steward for verification
- Add yourself to the directory
Most people discover they've been yak shaving for years before finding this page. Welcome. You are among your people.
See also: Guilds · Taxidermy Guild · Electronics Guild · Rubber Duck Guild · MetaGuild