Missing Stair: Difference between revisions

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Initial publication: Missing Stair concept - routing around harmful behavior instead of addressing it
 
Redirect to Excellent Hacker Fallacy (Noisebridge-originated concept)
Tag: New redirect
 
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= Missing Stair =
#REDIRECT [[Excellent Hacker Fallacy]]


== Routing Around Damage ==
{{R from alternative name}}
 
"The Internet interprets censorship as damage and routes around it." - John Gilmore
 
When a network node fails or a connection is censored, packets automatically reroute through working paths. No central authority decides this - it's distributed, automatic, resilient. The network keeps functioning.
 
Community social routing works this way too -- but at a huge cost.
 
== The Missing Stair Metaphor ==
 
Imagine a house with a broken stair. Everyone who lives there knows about it. They've learned to step over it automatically. They warn newcomers: "watch out for that step." But nobody fixes it.
 
'''A missing stair is a person in a community whose harmful behavior is worked around rather than addressed.'''
 
The term originated in a 2012 blog post describing known sexual predators in social communities - people everyone knew were dangerous, but instead of removing them, the community developed workarounds:
 
* Don't let new women be alone with him
* Warn people privately at events
* Create buddy systems
* Just avoid him if you can
 
The metaphor has since been generalized to describe anyone whose repeated harmful behavior is tolerated and routed around rather than confronted.
 
== The Range of Harm ==
 
Missing stairs exist on a spectrum:
 
'''SEVERE HARM''' (original usage)
 
* Sexual harassment or assault
* Physical violence or threats
* Predatory behavior toward vulnerable people
* Targeted harassment campaigns
* Stalking
 
'''PERSISTENT HARM'''
 
* Bullying or intimidation patterns
* Discriminatory behavior
* Abuse of power or authority
* Weaponizing community processes
* Monopolizing resources/spaces to exclude others
 
'''CHRONIC DYSFUNCTION'''
 
* Repeated conflict escalation
* Inability to collaborate constructively
* Consistent boundary violations
* Draining disproportionate community resources
 
The severity varies, but the pattern is the same: the community routes around the person instead of addressing the harm.
 
== Why Routing Happens Instead of Fixing ==
 
'''FEAR OF CONSEQUENCES'''
 
* The person might retaliate
* The person might claim victimhood
* The confrontation could split the community
* Legal concerns (defamation, liability)
* The person is "useful" in other ways
 
'''DIFFUSION OF RESPONSIBILITY'''
 
No single person feels responsible for addressing it. Everyone assumes:
 
* Someone else will handle it
* Someone with more authority should act
* It's not bad enough for me to say something
* Other people seem okay with it
 
'''NORMALIZATION'''
 
The longer the routing continues:
 
* The behavior becomes "just how they are"
* New people learn the workarounds without questioning them
* The routing becomes invisible infrastructure
* Addressing it feels like making a big deal out of nothing

Latest revision as of 17:41, 2 February 2026