Yak Shaving Guild: Difference between revisions
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''"I was going to fix the wiki, but first I had to update the server. But first I needed to learn Docker. But first I had to upgrade my laptop. But first I had to find my charger. But first I had to clean my desk. But first..."''{{guilds}} | ''"I was going to fix the wiki, but first I had to update the server. But first I needed to learn Docker. But first I had to upgrade my laptop. But first I had to find my charger. But first I had to clean my desk. But first..."''{{guilds}} | ||
== About == | == 🐃 About == | ||
'''What we do:''' Document, honor, and occasionally complete the endless chains of prerequisite tasks that stand between a hacker and their original goal. | '''What we do:''' Document, honor, and occasionally complete the endless chains of prerequisite tasks that stand between a hacker and their original goal. | ||
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'''How levels work:''' In this guild, levels represent self-awareness and documentation practice, not speed or efficiency. Finishing quickly is not the point. | '''How levels work:''' In this guild, levels represent self-awareness and documentation practice, not speed or efficiency. Finishing quickly is not the point. | ||
🟢 '''Aware''' = "I can recognize when I'm yak shaving" | |||
🟡 '''Documenting''' = "I diagram my yak shaves as they unfold" | |||
🟣 '''Transcendent''' = "I have achieved peace with the infinite regress" | |||
''Maximum verified depth is tracked separately. See Hall of Fame.'' | ''Maximum verified depth is tracked separately. See Hall of Fame below.'' | ||
{| class="wikitable" | {| class="wikitable" | ||
!Member | !Member | ||
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|- | |- | ||
|0xDEADBEEF | |0xDEADBEEF | ||
| | |🟣 | ||
|11 | |11 | ||
|Infrastructure yaks | |Infrastructure yaks | ||
|- | |- | ||
|Mirepoix | |Mirepoix | ||
| | |🟡 | ||
|7 | |7 | ||
|Toolchain yaks | |Toolchain yaks | ||
|- | |- | ||
|Barnacle | |Barnacle | ||
| | |🟡 | ||
|6 | |6 | ||
|Hardware yaks | |Hardware yaks | ||
|- | |- | ||
|sudo_feel_better | |sudo_feel_better | ||
| | |🟢 | ||
|4 | |4 | ||
|Documentation yaks (ironic) | |Documentation yaks (ironic) | ||
|- | |- | ||
|Pliers | |Pliers | ||
| | |🟢 | ||
|3 | |3 | ||
|Still identifying specialty | |Still identifying specialty | ||
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== Guild Norms == | == Guild Norms == | ||
==== '''Guild norms''' (developed through painful experience): ==== | |||
* If your yak shave exceeds '''5 levels deep''', you must diagram it for the archive | * If your yak shave exceeds '''5 levels deep''', you must diagram it for the archive | ||
* Depth claims require a witness or documentation. We've had... exaggerations. | * Depth claims require a witness or documentation. We've had... exaggerations. | ||
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== Hall of Fame: Legendary Shaves == | == Hall of Fame: Legendary Shaves == | ||
Verified chains of 5+ levels, documented for posterity. | Verified chains of 5+ levels, documented for glorious posterity. | ||
=== 🏆 The Eleven-Layer Infrastructure Yak (2024) === | === 🏆 The Eleven-Layer Infrastructure Yak (2024) === | ||
Revision as of 00:55, 14 December 2025
"I was going to fix the wiki, but first I had to update the server. But first I needed to learn Docker. But first I had to upgrade my laptop. But first I had to find my charger. But first I had to clean my desk. But first..."
| Noisebridge | About | Visit | 272 | Manual | Contact | Guilds | Stuff | Events | Projects | Meetings | Donate | E |
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🐃 About
What we do: Document, honor, and occasionally complete the endless chains of prerequisite tasks that stand between a hacker and their original goal.
What is yak shaving? Any seemingly pointless activity which is actually necessary to solve a problem which solves a problem which, several alarm levels away, solves the real problem you're working on.
Where: Everywhere. Yak shaving knows no physical bounds. This is a fully distributed guild. Members have reported shaving yaks from four continents, two airports, and one moving train.
Online: Find us in the Noisebridge Discord in the Guilds section as #🤘-yak-shaving
Equipment we steward: None. The yak is metaphorical. (Do not bring actual yaks to Noisebridge.)
Regular meetups: We keep meaning to schedule one, but first we need to fix the calendar integration...
Stewards
Stewards maintain the archive of legendary shaves and certify depth claims. This role rotates annually, assuming the handoff process ever gets finished.
| Name | Role | Since | Contact |
|---|---|---|---|
| 0xDEADBEEF | Steward | March 2023 | @deadbeef on Discord |
| Harriet | Steward Emeritus | 2019–2022 | Unreachable (still finishing original yak) |
Directory: Depths Achieved
How levels work: In this guild, levels represent self-awareness and documentation practice, not speed or efficiency. Finishing quickly is not the point.
🟢 Aware = "I can recognize when I'm yak shaving"
🟡 Documenting = "I diagram my yak shaves as they unfold"
🟣 Transcendent = "I have achieved peace with the infinite regress"
Maximum verified depth is tracked separately. See Hall of Fame below.
| Member | Level | Max Verified Depth | Specialty |
|---|---|---|---|
| 0xDEADBEEF | 🟣 | 11 | Infrastructure yaks |
| Mirepoix | 🟡 | 7 | Toolchain yaks |
| Barnacle | 🟡 | 6 | Hardware yaks |
| sudo_feel_better | 🟢 | 4 | Documentation yaks (ironic) |
| Pliers | 🟢 | 3 | Still identifying specialty |
Guild Norms
Guild norms (developed through painful experience):
- If your yak shave exceeds 5 levels deep, you must diagram it for the archive
- Depth claims require a witness or documentation. We've had... exaggerations.
- It is considered poor form to yak-shame. We've all been there.
- You may not count "making coffee" as level 1. That's just being alive.
- Recursive yak shaves (shaving a yak in order to document a yak shave) are scored separately
⚠️ Health advisory: If you have been shaving the same yak for more than 6 months, please reach out to a steward. We have resources.
Hall of Fame: Legendary Shaves
Verified chains of 5+ levels, documented for glorious posterity.
🏆 The Eleven-Layer Infrastructure Yak (2024)
Original goal: Update the wiki header
Documented by: 0xDEADBEEF
Goal: Update wiki header
└─ Need wiki admin access
└─ Need to contact previous admin
└─ Previous admin's email bounces
└─ Need to find them on social media
└─ LinkedIn requires account
└─ Need professional headshot
└─ Camera battery dead
└─ Charger cable frayed
└─ Need soldering iron
└─ Soldering iron tip corroded
└─ Need to order tips
└─ Amazon account locked
└─ [ABANDONED]
Header was eventually updated 8 months later by someone else.
The Backwards Time Machine Yak (2023)
Original goal: Recover file from backup
Documented by: Mirepoix
Goal: Recover file from backup
└─ Backup is on old hard drive
└─ Old hard drive uses FireWire
└─ FireWire adapter doesn't work on M1 Mac
└─ Need to boot old MacBook
└─ Old MacBook needs Yosemite
└─ Yosemite installer requires Apple ID
└─ Apple ID email is defunct Hotmail
└─ Hotmail account recovery requires phone number from 2009
└─ That phone number belongs to someone in Ohio now
└─ [CALLED STRANGER IN OHIO, SURPRISINGLY HELPFUL]
File was recovered. Purpose of file recovery, however, could not be recalled.
Recent Submissions
- Dec 2025: "The SSH Key Cascade" 6 (Barnacle) — original goal was to check server uptime
- Nov 2025: "The Font Incident" 5 (sudo_feel_better) — original goal was to send an email
- Oct 2025: "Nested Documentation" 5 (sudo_feel_better) — original goal was to document a yak shave
Knowledge Base
Resources for the practicing yak shaver:
- How to Recognize You're Yak Shaving — Warning signs and interventions
- Diagramming Standards — Official notation for yak shave trees
- The Ethics of Abandonment — When to walk away (and why it's okay)
- Yak Shave vs. Scope Creep — A taxonomy
- Famous Historical Yak Shaves — Including "how fixing a printer led to the creation of GNU"
How to Join
If you're reading this, you're probably already a member.
Formally joining is simple:
- Document your first yak shave of 3+ levels
- Submit it to a steward for verification
- Add yourself to the directory
Most people discover they've been yak shaving for years before finding this page. Welcome. You are among your people.
See also: Guilds · Taxidermy Guild · Electronics Guild · Rubber Duck Guild · MetaGuild