Mediation

I think I get my larger breasts from the paternal side with females in my family, although maternal side is normally sized. My mom wears a B cup and has no idea what it’s like to have huge boobs. When I was in high school and college, I was this itty bitty girl with huge boobs. I wore this cotton “bralette” that didn’t even fit my boobs in just so I’d have the appearance of a smaller chest. I feel like that’s been the pattern I’ve had throughout my adulthood- hiding the size of my chest. When I began taking birth control, I got a birthing body! My hips and breasts kind of had a mind of their own. I’ve put on 20 lbs since high school. There’s no telling how much of that is boob. 

I like to be active and what first began bothering me was the painful yeast sores I’d get under my breasts from sweat. I even purchased a TaTa towel so that my breasts could get some air while I was at home. Forget running errands after the gym, no. It’s time to air out the titties! Even if I don’t do anything active, showering and towel drying also yields the pain. That area of my skin literally never gets air because my boobies hang so low. ??????????? Moving on, I remember about four years ago, I went running with my hubby. I ran for about 20 seconds then turned around to go put an additional bra on. The sports bras that I do have now are so uncomfortable because they are like triple reinforced and one feels like it’s lined with steel. I’m not kidding! I can honestly say, I don’t have a comfortable bra. Idk what that feels like! What’s comfort? Regardless of the aesthetic and general size, it’s painful too. My boob are so heavy. After I’ve worn one of my “big momma” bras, as I refer to them, when I shed the damn thing, I literally have to hold my boobs up because they are so sore. I have constant back and neck pain. I HATE when people ask, “oh, is it your breasts that are making your neck sore?” because how in the heck would I know that? How can I identify what’s causing me pain? I don’t know what my neck would feel like with smaller boobs because I’ve never had them. Lastly, I saw that someone posted their boobs are defining them. They referred to it as idenTITTY. It makes total sense. I can’t count the number of girls that have talked to me about my breasts. From the VS size lady saying, “oh, you’re so lucky” to my mom’s friends who I’ve know for years messaging me saying “I didn’t notice you had large breasts...” oh and the favorite of them all “can I touch them?”. No matter who I am with, I can’t escape the one thing about myself that I am probably most self conscious about. I’m also a pretty conservative dresser, so boobs popping out of EVERYTHING is less than ideal. I recently had a military ball that I attended and wore my mom’s dress she’d had for a very long time. It was beautiful. But of course, one thing was out of proportion: my chest. I kept trying to cover it was the wrap thing I had for the 20s themed event, but alas, I just ended up looking wide. Just a few reasons that come to mind. Oh and I went to Carlsbad Cavern today where my husband and I spoke to a park ranger. He suggested we go in the summer and crawl through the crawl spaces to explore the cave. Yah,. Won’t be able to do that with my large boobs. They don’t squeeze through anything.